write your own eulogy

this post is related to the previous, instead of replying back in the comments area, i'd like to add a few comments here...

first, thanks to all of you who took the time to contribute and comment... i don't know what happened with the language though (i think ma6goog started with the profanity lol and everyone followed) well that's alright :P

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Eulogy : a speech or writing in praise of a person or thing, esp. a set oration in honor of a deceased person.

A friend of mine, Douglas, told me once,

"Aziz... you should write your own eulogy... and then live your life towards that eulogy"

If i want to be remembered as a kind person when i'm dead, i better start acting that way from now.

So... to comment on the comments...

i saw a theme there... most of you said that "if you can afford it, and you've paid your Zakat, you've given back to society, then its alright to lavish yourself and spoil yourself a little, especially if your heart is set on something"

two points here...

1. I would like to teach myself not to "Want" these things... with discipline, and will, i can be able to resist wanting this fast new car, or that bling bling.

2. of course, i am not saying (or if i did say it, then i apologize) that getting an expensive watch is BAD... Hey... there are many good people out there with nice things that are contributing and being philanthropic to a great extent.

But... it all depends on who you want to be... what you want to be remembered for.

I can choose to be a LEADER, or a FOLLOWER...

and i can choose to lead by FEAR or lead by LOVE...

if you want to lead and inspire the masses, then your actions should not be the same as if you wanted to be a lovable person but not a leader.

anywhere in the A and B areas is good, you'd do good and be loved, respected etc.

without going into religious figures like prophets,

an A figure would be someone like Ghandi,
a B figure would be, i don't know... anyone who's decent.
a C person, i don't know... anyone who's living from a place of fear
and a D person... hitler? saddam? ( ma6goog, mentions a couple on his blog :P )

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I think... and i hope, you all agree that leading by love, is more affective and long lasting than by fear.

To weild that kind of influence, you need to be trusted... and trust, with love, comes easier if you're humble rather than too proud...

it is not wrong having an expensive watch and wearing it around people who can't afford it, but you'd be creating invisible barriers for you to lead those people... if that is not your cup of tea, and if you don't care about that, you just want to be a good person who's loved... then the watch or car would not be an obstacle.

There is a reason why most leaders, religious or not... were humble common people... average joes... Jesus, Buddha, Ghandi, Kofi Annan, Abe Lincoln, Mohammed, osho, and many more.

There is a reason all those people denounced materliasm.

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I wish, when i'd die, i'd be rid of materialism... so i've started since that watch to change myself... and i am not without fault... i love cars and i love fine watches... but the journey of a thousand miles starts with a step... so i've started... and there will be ups and downs.. setbacks and gains in this journey... but i hope that God gives me the patience and will power to continue on that narrow path and not fall astray.

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The Citizen watch is 2000 KD... and its gone now anyway, someone already bought it, it was the only piece in the GCC...

When i was thinking about it, i tried to trick myself... i said to myself... ok, if i want to be EXTRA nice, i'll spend the same amount on good deeds. I'll give away 2000 KD to charities and then buy the watch (Hey... i'm single, so i have nothing else to spend on, i can afford it)

I felt relieved for 5 minutes that i found a solution... Then i said ok.. if i gave away that 2000 KD... then even the other 2000 KD for the watch... i can give half of it, or all of it away as well... and i started weighing the benefit of giving THAT 2000 KD or buying the watch...

Giving it away to charities always outweighs the watch...

So i didn't buy the watch...

Then my birthday came... and it was offered to me as a gift...

Test #2... Ok Mister!. you passed the first test, now what will you do if you can get the watch for free... NO STRINGS ATTACHED...

aaaaah... but there are always strings... as the saying goes "there is always free cheese on a mouse trap" nothing really is free...

so... i thanked the person who offered me the watch... and said... the offer itself is enough... but i do not need the watch...

I've regretted that move afterward.. yet paradoxically i felt relieved right away that this is behind me now...

The following days , i would remember the watch and get a bit worked up inside... but then that would fade away... and day after day... it washed away... and i'm glad i didn't get the watch...

I feel... (and call me insane, i dont care... but i feel)... i've attracted more Good energy since that event... The universe gives you what you want... Law of attraction...
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sorry for writing so much... it was meant to be a comment :-/